One thing that has often puzzled and, yes, annoyed me is that people aren't very good about staying in touch. With email, things are so much easier. You needn't have to write a letter (whether in longhand or on a computer), print it out, address an envelope, find a stamp or go to the post office, and post the letter in a mailbox. It's just a matter of writing and email and sending it off.
I admit that I am usually quite good about responding to emails. Some would say too good, in that I try to respond within the day. If I am travelling, I have an auto-response to that effect, but I still make the effort to respond in a timely fashion. Maybe that's annoying. Maybe people think I write back too quickly.
But why are so many other people the opposite of timely? And why do they take so much time to respond, or even not respond at all, if we are discussing more serious matters? I mean, sure, it takes more time to respond, but it is so hurtful when one tells a friend something personal and/or important and then waits eagerly for a reply that never comes (or finally comes but ignores that part of the message). If people feel it is too hard to find something to say in response, perhaps they shouldn't ask about personal matters or profess to be a person's friend. And, no, this doesn't just happen to me, so I don't think it's just a matter of people not liking me!
So this is a double peeve, really. Why don't people write back in a timely manner? And why do they often ignore the deeper parts of a message? Don't they realize that that makes the recipent feel sad and uncared-for? Is it so much harder to be a friend via email?
--Curly
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
2 comments:
Guilty as charged -- but then again, i get about 60-70 emails a day. Yup, a day. my list of flagged ones is, let's see, about that long as well, some dating back from the spring that i still haven't had a chance to respond to, and well, like today, up at 6am, class meeting, student meetings, meeting to prep for class, didn't even finish before had to go to another meeting, left if early so could get across campus in time to teach, back to office to respond to urgent emails to finally write grant proposal that had to be finished by 8pm, worked on it till 6:45 till realised had to leave to get back in time to see kids on skype, quickly fired off proposal to colleague who had agreed at the last minute to read it over, got back just in time to skype, then got proposal, worked on corrections, cooked dinner and ate from 8:10-8:25pm, continued working on proposal, finally finished and sent it off, 9:15, brain in a daze, unable to do much more than sit on couch and watch tv ... had time for a single pee all day -- just so incredibly busy that when i come home, well, sometimes i need to take a break from the computer! Also, some people are not good at firing off quickly emails. Every one i write seems to take at least 10 minutes ... I think about friends and family constantly, but haven't even written to my own family for days ... now, it's past my bedtime ... anyway, it's not that people don't care, it's just that well, it gets busy sometimes, and in a world dominated by computers, we get used to and expect instant responses. Back when we waited for letters, there was somehow more time, and more patience ...
xo -- kimba
Ah, I understand all that, Kimba. I think some people have good intentions, including you. You (and I am speaking generally here, not just about you specifically) have friends and want to know what is going on in their lives. And yet, the time just isn't there to keep up the correspondence. Life is busy for most people and I think many of us understand that.
It can be so hurtful, though, to be on the other side of that and to feel that a friend has just forgotten one or lost interest. Some friend.
--Curly
Post a Comment